Friday, April 02, 2004
i just realised how
stupid my last blog was. haha.. but dat's besides the point. dis is really wad i'm blogging for rite now:
u shd noe if i'm talking abt u. i dowan to sound lyk i'm scolding u or wad but i really hope u'll just wake up n c wad u'v reduced urself into for the past few mths. i think it's damn stupid dat u'r doing all dis incredibly silly things to urself, whether u realise it or not. mayb some pple in ur life dun gif a damn abt u but pretty much every1 has sum1 lyk dis in their lives to, so y let it bother u so much? there r other pple who care abt u lor okay?
i dowan to talk much to u dis days n i'm not sure if u realised it. but it's cos i'm actually q pissed off w u for becoming wad u r now. u were not lyk dis when i 1st got to noe u. cant u just snap out of dis shit? i dunno how to describe how i felt when i read ur blog but i kinda tot u sounded pathetic n i'm sorry but i dun mean it the sympathetic way.
so wad if u 2 cant get back? he's not the only person arnd lor. so y cant u just get over it? let it go since it's over n move on! i noe it's not easy but u hafta admit dat dat's the only way to move along. it's the only path u haf in front of u. dun stand there n keep luking back when u noe it's useless.
i dunno wad he really thinks, but lyk i told u b4, wad u can do is limited. if he doesnt wan to help himself n continues being such an idiot gambling n wadeva, den it's really up to him wad. do u think u really can help? u cannot lor. i tried to do the same but there was really nth much i cld do since the 1 i was trying to help din wan to bother to help himself. they hafta c the nid to change b4 they really will change.
instead of making urself feel even more miserable, y dun u channel ur energy to sth else? u noe ur results arent dat great den work harder! if u go to lessons w/o even knowing wad's being taught den how can u expect urself to do well? it'll just make u feel lousier in the end when the next common tests comes arnd. is dis wad u wan? dun keep saying u wanna go arts now lah okay? u noe n i noe very well dat dat's a stupid suggestion cos it's too late for u to do dat.
i dunno wad to say to u to make u realise how foolish u r lor. i reallly dunno.. i can only tell u wad i think abt wad has been happening all dis while but wadeva i say just doesnt seem to b going into ur head. listen to me okay? get over it, move on n do wad u'r supposed to do. dun mope arnd the whole day thinking of wad cld'v been or wad wld'v been if u din do wad u did. wad's done is done lor. sumtimes there's just no way to turn things back to the way it was b4.
dat day when i saw dat thing on ur wrist i was q horrified. how can u do dat to urself? i really dun understand lor. does it make u feel better? does it lessen the hurt u feel cos the pain is concentrated elsewhere? dun b stupid alr? it just adds on to the pain dat u'r feeling. do u noe the way u'r behaving is making us worried? there'r pple who care abt u but u refuse to get over things. actually all of us dun think there's really anything wrong w u. it's just dat u'r weakening mentally. so y r u letting dis happen?
i'll b arnd to listen to u when u nid me n i hope u wun b angry w me or wad, but i dun really care if u wan to hear all dis or not. i just hafta say dis again:
WAKE UP N MOVE ON. PLEASE.
random thoughts at 6:55:00 AM
